Friday, August 31, 2007

remembering...

this has been a mixed couple of days since arriving home...

within hours of stepping off the plane i received a call to tell me a colleague from my last job had died in ther early hours of tuesday in a murder/suicide following a marital row. he pulled the trigger.
tully and i worked alongside one another for two years. he was a great guy, brimming with enthusiasm and a truly vocational youth worker. he used to loan me cds and we often talked about music. he loved rock music but was unashamedly a fan of A-ha. we'd meet for smoke breaks and he told me about his life. for sure, he had his worries. but he was not the maniac depicted on the front pages of the tabloids. like all of us he was broken. and hurting. and in the end, i'm guessing, profoundly desperate. and i'm guessing Caroline in her own way was to... she was buried today.

for now i'm avoiding getting too close to the emotions and thoughts what few alleged details i know provoke, until such time as i have a safe space, and i'm living under the motto - what would sigmund do?
for now i'm pretty sure he'd say, wait 'til you're in the room with me... there is a darkness one should not visit without feeling firmly anchored...

love the one's you're with...

LB,x

1 comment:

  1. not sure what to say but wanted to touch worlds and say I'm thinking, Katie,x

    ReplyDelete