Friday, July 31, 2009

no sequins and boas, but throwin' metal \m/>..<\m/

after a load of rushing around this morning, i ended up deciding it was impractical, in what is going to be an expensive August, for me to go to Belfast this weekend. which meant accepting as i unpacked my bag that i'd not be joining Changing Attitudes Ireland this year for the Belfast pride parade (this afternoon). which is disappointing as i'd really have liked to have shown my support.
but my spirits were soon lifted. standing a little dejectedly in the kitchen pouring myself a coffee i felt a low deep vibrating beat in the ceiling. i initially thought it was the people living in the flat above me but i usually can't hear anything from them. the sound got more rhythmic, then stronger, and then it turned into a roll of beats... and that's when i remembered....

it's the 1st of august. this is a 3 day holiday weekend. and the park around the corner is closed to the public because Metallica are headlining a big outdoor gig with so many support bands it's something of a mini metal fest.

the coaches are starting to pull up and soon this place is going to be overrun with metal fans on foot and the traffic is going to come to a standstill. and i get to sit on my deck and listen to the whole thing for free. i'm thinking i'll head up to my parentals' balcony tonight as apparently they can usually see the stage from there.

and then tomorrow it all kicks off again with Fat Boy Slim headlining another day of music.

so i miss out on the drag queens and the fundamentalists wielding their bibles, but heck, it's not everyday the metalllers come to your back yard. the Lord taketh away, the Lord giveth...

so i think i'm gonna embrace the mayhem that's coming our way and enjoy every wall vibrating minute of it. they say plants grow better when listening to Mozart. i don't know what my blooms are going to think of Alice in Chains, but it's breezy in the sunshine and they look like they're already moshing. thin lizzy are also supporting. there's no question whiskey in the jar is gonna bring the house (field) down.

(beneath this video at youtube there's a brief discussion on whether or not james hetfield is a Christian. i always understood he had good reason since his youth to have pretty antagonistic feelings on the subject and i think that he's got himself clean and sober is all that matters. that's a courageous journey of faith to be on and signing up for doctrine pales in comparison. so it makes not an ounce of difference to me. anyone who's seen the some kind of monster documentary can be in no doubt that Metallica are some kind of dysfunctional, but heck, aren't we all.

but it got me thinking and laughing. traditionalists think greenbelt is some kind of den of sin... i know cheryl, nadia and i have been known to tear up the dancefloor, but it don't look like nothing like this.)

wherever you are, rock on, even if it's in sequins.


Thursday, July 30, 2009

here lies buried treasure

i think this'll be my favourite piece of writing from this week. i just don't see how it can be beaten*:

michael chabon, on childhood as a branch of cartography. relish that description and ignore the misleading title when you get there... girls get to be adventurers too. beautifully written and quietly provocative stuff this.

big t'anks go to Joel for sliding this one-of-many-gems across the virtual table.


look right and make sure you check out david's link at ::peer pressure is forever::
for a _great_ cornel west interview. (*serious contender)

right, pj's are on, hot choc malt is made, time for a book and my duvet.

keep thinking...


ironically longer than main post post-script...

:: i like to stand firmly in the question::

- (the ever-welcoming) jules, over on queermergent. one of my favourite quotes of the week. and maybe ever.

meant to say earlier in week and didn't get around: if ACNA, FOCA and Anglican Mainstream aren't your theological cup of tea then there's some interesting thoughts continuing lately over at Queermergent, (see side bar on right) which encouragingly is building its archive of LGBTQA stories and essays from a range of theological and denominational perspectives (but all beyond homophobia and misogyny).
from the iconoclasts to the more orthodox, i'm liking the diversity, as whatever this thing that gets called the emerging movement might be or not be, to say all are singing from exactly the same hymn sheet would be misrepresentative. the latest 2 posts are exploring aspects of covenant theology and sexuality - from voices within Anglican (UK) and Presbyterian (US) contexts. i'm enjoying seeing the often (very) different paths folks trace that bring them all into the same inclusiver space on the map.

in a not wildly dissimilar vein, i see glaad has a piece on radio and "Godcasts" that are exploring faith from LGBT perspectives.

right, this time i really am for bed.

keep thinking... and stand firmly in the question.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

schism on the inside

i got to thinking...

talking to god is laurel begging hardy for a gun.

- josh ritter.

i've been thinking a lot these past couple of weeks. a lot. and i've come to the conclusion that faith cannot for me be based on believing _in_ something but only being drawn into a way of being. which is believing in something.

and as soon as i fall on that as something i can live with, i realise it's an impossible task.
undergoing this becoming means to embrace always failing.

the Christ i fell in love with kicked over tables in a rage of fury.

the best part of 20 years later, i'm wondering how the fuck are we meant to wage peace. right now i want to turn some tables.

over ten years ago i said i wanted no easy path. i wanted to struggle. no fake plastic faith. and that's what i got. be careful what you pray for, right? i'd like to take it back. i think i've got the joke. the path is so much harder than i could ever imagined.



Peter said to Paul
"All those words that we wrote
Are just the rules of the game and the rules are the first to go"
But now talkin' to God is Laurel beggin' Hardy for a gun
I gotta girl in the war, man I wonder what it is we done

Paul said to Petey
"You gotta rock yourself a little harder;
Pretend the dove from above is a dragon and your feet are on fire"
And I got a girl in the war, Paul the only thing I know to do
Is turn up the music and pray that she makes it through

Because the keys to the kingdom got locked inside the kingdom
And the angels fly around in there, but we can't see them
And I gotta girl in the war, Paul I know that they can hear me yell
If they can't find a way to help, they can go to Hell
If they can't find a way to help her, they can go to Hell

Paul to Petey "you gotta rock yourself a little harder;
Pretend the dove from above is a dragon and your feet are on fire"
But I gotta girl in the war, Paul her eyes are like champagne
They sparkle, bubble over, in the morning all you got is rain
Sparkle, bubble over, in the morning all you got is rain
They sparkle, bubble over, in the morning all you got is rain

your peace is doing violence to my violence. and my anger is only matched by your persistance in convincing me there can be no other way. and i don't know if i can rock myself any harder...

your truth is not difficult. it's impossible. wouldn't it be easier to just shoot me now?


Wednesday, July 22, 2009

waxes and wanes

i don't know where to begin on catching up.
the folks whose unsecured wifi i was piggybacking on went on holiday and closed their windows and simultaneously my parentals' wifi went kaput, and my email was decidedly crotchety as a result. but lack of anything like consistent online access has not all been bad.
despite the vagueries of the weather, my deck is close to full bloom and responding well to my near obsessional deadheading. i've been doing some advance reading for uni, mostly brushing up on irish women's history. i've felt quite cut off from the world, which means i escaped the 12th, and most of the michael jackson memorial excesses, but all the same it didn't stop me getting seriously upset at the conservative Anglicans in the US and UK. i've had visitors to stay. saw the new harry potter movie. learned to make cinnamon rolls. ate too many cinnamon rolls. had a religious experience in a clothing store and didn't walk away empty handed. over several evenings i've watched the entire span of the x-files myth arc episodes*, which was a comfort blanket to some darker stuff that was threatening to pull me down and under. actually, now i think of it, i've been in a very sci-fi zone. i enjoyed rewatching gilliam's 12 Monkeys and re-reading Brave New World. i didn't enjoy the latest SoF (a first for me) and am currently watching the Alien Quadrology along with umpteen hours of extra footage.
i've been reading a lot the past few weeks. for pleasure, as well as education, i'm currently enjoying Armstrong's latest, The Case for God: What Religion Really Means.
but best of all, weaved through it all, has been deep and life-enriching conversation by mail.
so all in all, it's not been a bad couple of weeks. scatty and inconsistent and at times frustrating, but more than livable.

so, now that i have lovely wifi and broadband all of my own, my email is working perfectly again, and today i'm mainlining radio4. i'm enjoying jeanette winterson's series of reflections on all things lunar, The Inconstant Moon. and my brother has sent me to the annotated watchmen (which i don't imagine will be beaten for my favourite book i've read this year) and i think i'm gonna be diving back into that world far quicker than i intended or imagined.

speaking of the moon, there's many a version, but this one my favourite. as with so many things, the slower, the better.

right, i have a load of things i promised others i'd do as soon as got back online and i am already falling behind after less than a day. sheesh. greenbelt is suddenly coming too quick and i need to get my loose threads for ikon seriously tidied up so i can start looking forward to it again. the ikon site and mail addresses are down and i'm not sure it could have happened at a more inconvenient time. still, doesn't stop me from getting my own ass in gear.

all good things to all of ye.


*bar season 3. if anyone knows who the heck borrowed my s3 boxset, let me know. along with my s1 of Six Feet Under.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Saturday, July 18, 2009

patience is virtue

1. get telephone. check.
2. get landline connected. check.
3. order broadband. check.
4. install modem. check.
5. wait for up to 10 working days for lights on modem to start blinking to indicate broadband is connected. status: pending.
6. set up secure wifi network. status: pending. (see 5)
7. surf online to your hearts content. status: pending. (see 6)


Thursday, July 09, 2009

touch wood... lick frosting

looks like the email technical issues are sorted.

online access remains limited but at least i can use Mail when i am online and MobileMe is now happy because it can once again talk to Mail. i was terrified i was going to have to send the laptop away for a software fix but i've just tracked down a tip on a forum and thank the Lord it appears to have worked. all i know of the cause is that something appears to have gotten corrupted.

to save the Father, i'll say it:
with me around? surely not.

but it's fixed so i really don't care what caused it. as long as it keeps working from here on in.

right. 36 hours ago i was determined to learn how to make cinnamon rolls having read Peace Like A River by Leif Enger (in which they are baked several times). all the palava with trying to fix mail Mail means i didn't get around to it, and i'll admit to being a little uncertain about the recipe i had found. but with Mail and thus calm now restored i've done another search and come across an Alton Brown overnight recipe that's looking a lot more reliable.

thank the Lord for geeks who spend their days answering strangers queries on forums for little or no thanks.

if i'm needed, i'll be in the kitchen.


Monday, July 06, 2009

technical issues - attn Shirley

i'm mostly offline this week and to top it off am now having severe email problems. something's aglitch with syncing my mobileme account and when i try to send out replies from mail they disappear.

so, this is a note for shirley (and anyone else that's been emailing me)- i can see the mails as they come in but having trouble responding.

ack. desperate to get this shite sorted. the only way i can pick up my mail is on my UK iphone and that data roaming bill is gonna be horrible if this goes on much longer. i can't tell where the problem is originiating.


Saturday, July 04, 2009

incomplete theology

artist's statement:


some very quickly taken random snapshots of the unfinished sketches, Incomplete Theology, up in the back room at Common Grounds for July. i didn't have time or my camera to focus in on the pencil notes written on them and detailed elements that you need to be up close to see, but you can click on them to enlarge allthesame. i guess this is something of a visual doodling about and around what Adele, aka, existential punk is describing in her latest post. kind of...

G-D, rid me of God...



Christa ...


errrrmmmm... WTF?

so. Palin's quitting. i've watched the announcement. twice. i'm not the only one completely confused am i? new direction? on another level? does this mean she's more likely or less likely to be running for President in 2012...?




sorry. i appeared to have some kind of seizure there. what was i saying? oh yep, Palin for PotUS 2012




hmmm. just had another one.

seriously lads. anyone wishing to start formulating an escape plan from the most powerful nation on earth for Jan '12, just in case the unthinkable should (God forbid) happen, gimme a call.

so, while we wait to hear what's behind all that bizarre allusion, happy 4th July.


new outfit

sorry. i know this is the second change in a month. hopefully it'll be sorted and settled soon.

more later.

Friday, July 03, 2009

in brief

after a fucking horrendous night with precious little sleep, today has been gloriously... summer. and overall better than i expected it to be.

busy doing nice things with jayne and (not un-nice) ikon things. back to belfast tomorrow. sketches have to go up in the cafe.

nothing to say. trying very hard right now to keep myself in the present.