Monday, January 16, 2006

struggling together. keep the faith

Harbours.

for a real treat in some beautifully constructed self expression, please go visit the newly opened Harbour of Ourselves... this man is capable of far more than saucy postings in my comments box. his writing is as much a joy to read as it is humbling in its eloquence. although saucy comments are just as appreciated for their light hearted levity on dark days. yes sir, i have the Vicks, thank you.

harbours... i have one or two, i know. and i know i have been a harbour myself on occasion.
i was struck while travelling in Scotland of my sense of intense need. for security and care. of the place within me where fear and fragility sit. of how long a journey we must go through to get to a place of freedom and peace.


Here be Monsters.

it's a scary out here in this vast open plain without the apparant security of my fortress. when i think about all the change that is to come i am so overwhelmed. sometimes thinking two days ahead is too much. but to find inspiration in small things, moments and people, that can sometimes be all we can do and hope they will be enough to keep us going into the next day. and that they will all somehow weave into a new life... i think when we express ourselves we are showing each other our maps... i am so thankful to be able to stumble alongside... real honesty is when we show even those bits of the map we drew in so that we wouldn't feel so scared...might we dare to rub them out and journey with the unknowness...

The Gulf of Terror.

the flip side of inspiration is intimidation. but in my cold-addled brain that is far from a clarified thought. but one for musing... there's something there about the gap between where we are and where we might hope to get to...


His Ears are HardWired to his Heart.

As i understand it there is a very strong possibility that my brother is going to visit for a few days next month. i almost don't want to believe it. it's too good to be true. just the mere thought of it brings so much emotion bubbling up and my knees to buckle. for those who do and don't know him, i hope i can organise some time to hang out with him and for him to meet those who have become so important to me. so that he will know that i am held together by dear and precious people. he is a benchmark for dearness and preciousness. ewan carries a wealth of creativity and care within him that never fails to astound me, and an openess of spirit that welcomes people into his heart as soon as he smiles.

the good dr has just provided me with a restorative lunch. so i'll stop typing and start eating.

more to come later... hopefully more clarity.

LB, x

1 comment:

  1. Cary, thank you for your kind words and your disarming honesty regarding who you are becoming - don't change, you're beautiful

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